It is always extremely difficult to survive the sudden loss of a loved one, and how to survive the death of loved ones — a husband or wife, father or mother, son? And it’s not in vain in this context that the word “experience” (live) is used.
Surviving such a difficult case and trying to go further after the close of the lives of loved ones is the main priority that should cost the widow.
After a while, the state of passion and the destruction of the soul and life will pass, almost every person is able to survive the loss and reintegrate into society.
How to survive the death of a loved one — the advice of a psychologist
After the death of a husband, women, in most cases, experience three specific emotional states:
Guilt. In this case, as mentioned above, a woman starts asking questions like these: “Why couldn’t I prevent it?” Or “Have any of my actions been the cause of death?” This stage is quite natural for any person who has experienced a loss.
The most important thing is not to get stuck on it.
Increased aggression on other people.
At this stage, women begin to wonder: «Why is everything good for others, and I am in misfortune?»
The most important thing in this situation is that the loss of a loved one does not give rise to any other problems and disagreements with other close people, because you don’t say it, but they will be less concerned about the death of her husband. In this case, you can contact a psychologist who will help remove the gratuitous aggression and survive the death of a loved one.
Aggression on yourself. Such aggression is expressed in the first stage of thoughts of suicide.
In this case, if the plans are really close to being carried out, you should definitely turn to close people or to a specialist for help.
How to survive the death of a beloved husband
However, the root of each of these mental states is one — emotions that necessarily arise after a loss. During this period, you need to try to overcome the emotions arising in yourself — after all, no one will be better off of them, and especially you.
No less important will be the presence of close people after what happened next to you, who will be able to understand and support you so that you will not have questions — how to survive the death of loved ones?
Native people and friends will always be able to help in overcoming their loss with the greatest possible means.
They will experience it with you.
After all, together everything is always done easier — and work and experiences. To survive the death of a husband, you should not fence yourself from the outside world and society, it can help you, even if you think that it is in principle impossible at this stage of life.
Returning the subconscious to the topic of loss, in fantasy or dreams, will be the result of the fact that you could not work through this topic and the topic of the tragedy that occurred. Switching to other thoughts and complaints to one’s own address is the use of a mechanism for crowding out unpleasant and undesirable experiences from one’s consciousness.
And if the experiences remain in your mind for a long time, then it is quite possible that they will create a psychological trauma for the rest of your life.
How to help survive the death of his son
A person who had to endure the death of an only child is often left alone with this grief. Naturally, people around will become close to him and help him, but people will ignore the talk of death.
The content of the moral help that they can provide will be reduced to 2 phrases: “Krepis” and “Life goes on”. To the aid of a person who has experienced such a tragedy, there is every chance of coming to the knowledge that our forefathers owned, and which have been forgotten in recent years.
In the old days, when medicine was not so developed, similar grief in families happened often. Therefore, people developed a pragmatic alignment and referred further stages of the tragedy experienced by the relatives of the deceased.
You should know the stages of grief in order to control your state of mind. This will help you in time to understand if you have stayed in one of them in order to appeal to experts in such a situation.
The first stage is shock and stupor, in which you do not believe in loss and cannot accept it. In this stage, people manifest themselves in a variety of ways, someone stiffens in grief, someone tries to forget about the funeral arrangements, calming other family members.
“Depersonalization” happens, as soon as a person does not quite understand who he is, where and why he is present.
Here will help soothing infusions, massage.
To survive the death of a son, do not be alone, weep if you can. This stage continues within 9 days.
Then, up to forty days, has the opportunity to continue the stage of denial, at which you already understand your loss, although your understanding will not yet be able to come to terms with what happened. Often during this period people hear the voice and steps of the deceased.
If he begins to dream, then talk to him in a dream, demand to come to you.
Talk about gone with relatives and friends, remember him. During this period, it is normal to cry often, but they cannot continue around the clock.
If the blocking and torpor stage is still ongoing, you need to contact a specialist.
Some relief of pain will happen by the year after death, although a new splash is usually assumed a year. If you already know how to manage your own grief, then your feelings will not be strengthened in much the same way as on the day of the tragedy.
If you have experienced all these stages well, by the end of 2 years the process of “mourning” is over.
This does not mean that you forget about your grief, although by this time you have already learned to live in the absence and remember it brightly, your despondency will not always be accompanied by tears.
You will have other plans, new goals and incentives for life. We hope that our advice helped you answer the question: «How to survive the death of the only son.»
How to live after the death of parents
So the world is arranged, that there is nothing eternal. All people are mortal, every second someone on the planet dies.
One cannot escape from death, sooner or later she will overtake everyone. Therefore, we must learn to put up with the fact that at times people close to us leave us.
Of course, it is very difficult. After all, life is changing forever. And nothing will be the same as before.
But life goes on, you live. Of course, at first it is very difficult to understand.
It is especially hard to come to terms with the death of parents to a child who still does not understand why a mother or father will never come again. But this is a separate issue.
It’s a little easier for an adult to handle it.
When parents die, there is a feeling that the whole world collapsed. It is one thing when they die at the age of 80 — this is understandable; for more than a year you have known that this can happen on any given day.
But when they die of a disease, in a car accident at 45, it’s hard to understand.
Gather all the strength
Be sure to get together. You can not give the correct answer to the question of why it happened, and how to survive the death of parents and quickly start a normal life.
Everything is not as simple as it seems.
You will have to get used to the new life without parents. It is better if you will be with someone who can support you in a difficult moment — a loved one, children, close friends.
Do not be afraid of emotions
You can be overwhelmed with emotions, or vice versa, you can feel only emptiness. These reactions are quite natural. If you want to cry — cry.
To survive the death of loved ones do not hold the pain in yourself. As a last resort, get a diary, and express to it all your experiences.
Do the usual things
It is clear that you will feel that there is no strength left for anything.
But this does not mean that you need to forget about the children, stop cooking, wash, clean, go to work.
If you do something, you will quickly get used to the idea that there are no more parents. You will be at least a little distracted from the tragedy, which is very important.
As you already understood, the question “how to survive the death of parents” does not have an unequivocal answer. It all depends on your degree of attitude, age, cause of death — after all, an unfair death is always harder than a natural death from old age.
But the main thing is to remember that life goes on, that everyone ever leaves, and this does not mean that the world loses its meaning. You will never forget your parents — they live in your heart, in your memory.